Tuesday, December 28, 2010

Wondering About the Parents of Today

I have posted about kids today a few times, after all the kids of today are definitely being raised differently than what you and I were.  There are less spankings going on and less privileges taken away and it’s going to hurt our country.

I can honestly say that I am scared to see our world in 10+ years when the kids that are in middle school now are beginning to work in this world.  I am afraid that the truth may ring correct with our retirement not being until much later.  And it’s simply because these kids aren’t ready, they simply aren’t prepared to take on such large roles.  They are ready because they aren’t disciplined and they lack the responsibility.

Several weeks ago an incident happened with Kayla at school that is still ringing loudly in my head.  I am still bothered by it. 

Kayla’s class was in the computer lab in the library and one of her “so called friends” mentioned that her weave was itching.  Kayla simply ask a question about weave.  She ask “did it hurt when you got it?”.  Now to answer that question, one with a set of brains would just simply state yes or no and maybe a few details of what it’s like when getting it put in.  However, this little girl immediately calls Kayla, racist.  Let’s think on this a moment.  Kayla ask a question, nothing rude or mean, just a simple question that she obviously doesn’t know anything about. 

The definition according to the Merriam Webster dictionary is:

Racism -

1. a belief that race is the primary determinant of human traits and capacities and that racial differences produce an inherent superiority of a particular race

2. racial prejudice or discrimination

I do not think her question relates to what being racist really means.  Heck, even some white people get weave put in their hair!

Well Kayla immediately went into defensive mode.  She told the girl that she was not racist and that in fact she had 3 cousins that were mixed and friends that were black and so on. 

The attack didn’t stop there.  The little black girl spread it around throughout the 6th grade hall and by the end of the day, I am sure that it was blown completely out of proportion and things were probably said that Kayla didn’t utter one word of.

She came home that day nearly in tears because all of the friends that she thought were her friends were not talking to her except to call her racist and snicker at her.  I consoled her and said don’t worry about it that it would all go away.  So the next day {Friday} when she went to school I was sure that everything had just blown over.  But when I picked her up that afternoon, it hadn’t.  She was nearly in tears again because she was being called racist by all those same kids again.  I ask her why hadn’t she gone to the counselor at school and told them.  She said she didn’t want to be a tattle tale.  {Hmm.  Wonder if that’s what the teachers say to the kids that tattle…}

Anyways.  I ask her what friends on her Facebook were saying that to her.  She told me.  Since she was grounded at the time from going online I went on and took each of them off and sent them a little message from myself stating that Kayla wasn’t racist and that calling her that was going to stop.  I was ready to be at the school Monday morning if she needed me to be there.

She of course didn’t want to go to school Monday morning but I told her to get off the bus and go straight to the office and that if they weren’t going to do anything about it then when she got back to the classroom to call me and I would come up there. 

I sat at work waiting on the phone to ring but it never did.  I figured to myself well I guess those kids got in trouble or Kayla was in ISS {in school suspension} with the bunch.  However, I picked her up that afternoon and everything was fine.  Wonder if my messages to those kids meant something.  I’ll never know. 

But I do know that something so simple as a question like that should have never been blown out of proportion.  I just wonder how she’s actually being raised.  If it’s to be racist herself to take such a question like that the way she did, I feel for her and her family.  I pray that they see the light!


Kay said...

That would and should have been a perfectly wonderful opportunity for the young girl to share and communicate with Kayla some of the different ways we all live our daily lives. The cultural differences are alive and well between the races and the only real way to understand each other is through education, understanding and knowledge. It is certainly not racist to ask innocent questions about another person's culture. That other girl was overly sensitive and probably taught that those questions are an attack on her personally. It's a real shame. I wish blacks and whites could grow a tougher skin and try harder to understand. Now is the time. I have lots of questions about other cultures but am literally afraid to ask for the simple reason that I would offend someone. Tell Kayla she certainly did nothing wrong and as a matter of fact was a brave girl by trying to educate herself. I'm proud of her:)

Kelli said...

WHAT??!! First of all, it's not just Black people who get weaves so the girl is not that smart to begin with obviously. I have such a hard time with kids today and how they treat others and how their parents don't response to their actions. My heart breaks for Kayla because she is so sweet and I know would never have ill thoughts about others. UGH!!!! Give her a hug from her BLACK friend in Ohio :)